crazy? or unwell?

I hate to admit it but some times I get in touch and come face to face with my emotional side. It usually starts with a single event that leads into a ripple effect. All this time I thought I had this figured out. I'll say this for a fact that I'm such a B-I-G moron when it comes to dealing with emotions. Thus, the lag on my entries. At my old blog, it would take me around 3 months to muster the will to write an entry.

Why would things get so complicated when it came to this part? I see things in black and white. Period. But when emotions came into consideration it seemed like there's the whole spectrum of colors to deal with. When would it ever end? It's really that simple to understand but why, oh why, can't I make it stop? I'm no longer wishing, let alone, hoping, but still something is in there that I don't know and it's like making me insane.

One time, I was about to go to sleep when a pang of desolation came over me. There's something I need to do and I don't know what. Or something that I wanted but can't seem to figure out what exactly it is. I ended up banging my head on my pillow 'til my foolishness drove me to sleep.
Well, psychiatric help is just a phone away. hehehe...