Tuesday, July 19, 2005

van-for-hire

I was in a van-for-hire going to Bogo last Saturday afternoon. Ecstatic. That best describes my emotion at that time considering the fact that I never visited there for the last 4 months. My 2-year old nephew, Tapol, was jumping with joy when he saw... uhmmm... That's not really my story here.

When riding in a crowded vehicle, there are 3 things that totally piss me off.
1) Sitting next to a bulk of fat or a big chunk of muscles or a combination.
2) Sitting next to a malodorous body i.e. smelly armpit, rotten feet, stinky breath, etc.
3) Sitting next to a dozed off boozer.

While I was in the van, Lady Luck must've scorned me so much because I happen to be seated at the rightmost and beside me was a man who is all 3 of those I mentioned above. Well, almost. He's bulky, wearing a strong perfume (it's as potent as a pungent vagina!) and sleeping soundly. Thank heavens, he's not drunk.

What triggered my dilemma was that he was literally putting his weight on me while dozing off. I felt like a fly squatted against a brick wall with a slipper. He would sometimes bend his head sideward in such a way that it was resting on my shoulder. Poor me. I'm just a mere 5'4", 125-pounder with a small build.

I was hoping he would be tag then I wouldn't mind the weight at all even if he started to climb on top of me. teehehehe... I constantly shrugged my shoulder to wake him up. And in one point, instantaneously bended over so he would fall from his slumber. He mumbled something and adjusted his seating so he wouldn't harass me unintentionally. A wicked smile crossed my face. After some time, he excused himself and bended over so I can rest my back on the seat. I was moved and dismissed all unholy things I am planning on him.

5 comments:

aneshka said...

What wicked thing did you do?

Pungent vagina? How does it smell like? Don't ask me, I'm not a ballerina so I'm not that flexible to smell my vagina hahaha!

P.S.

oi! shock ko nakakita sa akong nawong sa imong blog

Anonymous said...

hahaha... Poor you!!!

nangaon na sad mi pizza last night! libre na pud! hehehe...

splat said...

aneshka, ang mga gwapa dapat gyud ipakita ang dagway...

splat said...

gwenn, suya kaayo ko ninyo da... maayo unta magkalibang mo kay wala mo nangimbitar... teehehehe

Ivan said...

Very interesting and funny article.
I recently rent a van. I need to transport my stuff to another flat and I called to van hire company and booked one but without driver. Driving van is little bit different than driving sedan, because vans are significantly taller, longer and wider than cars and have a wider turning radius.